sighhh

things are just kind of goin right now. i think im finally getting things right in my life, for once.
i dont even know why im up. i dont think my body will be able to sleep. im all achey.
itunes is making me mad. it wont sync my music. like it wont put my new playlists on it. idkk. and genius, i have no idea how to work it. it must take a genius to work it. aha. punny.
okay, so im a lameo. with a big heart. lately, aha call me a girl, but i have been getting sad over the weirdest things. i guess its a good thing.
i love how in the bible, when people are distressed, other people can mourn with them. like in job, when he is down, his friends stop by, see in him pain, and suffer with him. they rip their robs, pull on their hair, rub dirt.. cry.. idk what else. but like, they were so expressive back then, i wish i could do that now.
like when kimberly was put in the hospital or whatever happened, i was so panicked, i started crying a little.
when gabby was left behind by her family over the break, and she was stuck at her aunts house, i felt exactly what she would feel, cause i kind of know what thats like. but i felt the hurt along with her.

i dont know exactly where im going with this, but its just something ive noticed over the past few days. most of the time i want to mourn or cry with the people, but i hold them back. for some reason, i feel its not right. i have no idea whats going on.
but tonight was excellent. everyone was there, i was so, so so so, happy to be with everyone, finally.
im not sure whats going on, but im seeing God working his way back into my life. or thats how i'd like to view it, even though i know he's always been there. im just starting to see him again.